If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s Collingwood. Another thing I can’t stand is Collingwood’s Dale Thomas’ head.
Fair dinkum this bloke gets photographed more often than Jennifer Hawkins and Roberta Williams put together.
Check out today’s Sunday Herald Sun. Thomas’ smug head is on the front and back cover and to be found no less than four times in the newspaper which is really more like a gossip magazine these days.
It is a Sunday ritual to walk the dog to the milk bar, and buy the paper. While walking back home you can read the hard hitting articles about what Roberta, Kylie, Bec and Nicole are up to.
You advance a couple of pages to find out where Wayne Carey is now living and who he is living with. A quick jump to the sports pages leaves you confronted face to face with page after page of Dale Thomas.
This happens every Sunday morning – and the Sunday AGE is no better.
It works out well though because by the time I’ve bought the paper and walked the dog around the block, I’ve read the rag from cover to cover and I then get to use the paper to start a fire in the fire place at home.
Back to Thomas’ head.
Since this pretty boy burst onto the scene he has become a fascination to the paparazzi who snap him from every angle and pose, whether he’s cuddling his team mates, kissing ol’ sooky Malthouse or waving to the crowd after a fluke goal.
And if I hear him get compared to Ron E Wearmouth again, I’m gunna be sick. Just cos’ he’s got wild, untamed hair. With that criteria, Thomas could also be compared to Germaine Greer, Jaques Christeu and Albert Einstein.
I don’t give a stuff if Thomas can play footy either. I’m just sick, sick, sick of being bombarded with his Collingwood pretty boy head in my face.
Piss off Collingwood – the only time I want to read about you is when you win another wooden spoon.
8 Comments
July 7, 2008 at 6:52 pm
Poor, poor Collie Gray. As if the dismal efforts of your bomb-outs isn’t giving you enough to winge about, you have to have a sook about seeing too many pics of Dale Thomas’ head. And all that critisism about his looks coming from a bloke whose team used to have a player with a nick-name of fetus(because he actually looked like one).
Maybe you’re just pissed off because you can’t find any pics of any of your blokes kicking ‘flukey goals’. You’d probably be happy with any bloody goals at all. Fair dinkum, the only decent thing your blokes have done this year is beat Carlton twice, and for that I shall be forever grateful, but until they start actually winning against some of the other sides out there, you won’t be seeing all the smiling, kissy, fist in the air type of photos.
You’ll probably have to put up with photos of them with their heads hanging down, hands on hips as they trapse off the ground dejected yet again as they listen to some other theme song playing in the background.
You can sook all you want, we’ve got Daicos #2 and you’ll be seeing plenty more of his photos as he kicks goals, takes spekky marks over everyone else and tears up the midfield leaving all others in his wake. And I don’t care if you don’t enjoy reading the newspaper anymore either….read a bloody book for a change instead of colouring them in you big bomber sooky sooky la la.
July 7, 2008 at 7:22 pm
Dear Judester, I fear this is not the first (or last) time you have had to defend Dale (The pretty) Thomas…
July 7, 2008 at 8:22 pm
Never trust a bloke with two first names…
July 7, 2008 at 8:26 pm
True story – I know Dale Thomas’ uncle and aunt.
His uncle barracked for Carlton before Dale got drafted by the Pies, so now he’s a card carrying Magpie supporter who deep down supports the Blues. (Probably a club of one).
Earlier in the year when Carlton beat Collingwood, the uncle was heard to approach Dale in the Collingwood rooms, whistling a familiar little tune:
“Da da-da da-da”
July 7, 2008 at 8:33 pm
You leave fetus alone! 2000 grand final Sean Denham, dad and brother with somerville turn up at mcg hotel pre match, now Col and the boys get chatting with the dad ex boxer? looked like one! Barnesy was on the bog when he came back he was introduced to Seans dad! Barnseys first comment was! Now Sean was in the conversation! at this time as well!! do you know what your sons nickname was!!!!!!!!!!!!! Only the Barnes man eh!!!!!! True Story. Kev. I was there.
July 8, 2008 at 10:37 am
Never trust a bloke with two first names…
Pear, that sounds fine coming from you -
‘Bruce’ ‘Clarke’
July 8, 2008 at 10:37 am
Right you are Pommie – only Barnsey indeed!
July 8, 2008 at 11:34 am
Never been a good footballer called Dale…..