DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, SMITTY’s collection of BAD FOOTY CARDS.

SMITTY: My funniest footy cards…I’ll explain why.

1. Ron Alexander – never seen a player take the photo more seriously.  Looks like he got out his comb and some brylcream and trimmed the mo, then put on his most serious face.  Also he looks about 45 years old.

Tipsmaster’s note: Smitty – there’s nothing wrong with being 45 years old. I’m only a few years shy of 45 and you were in the same year as me at school…and Pear and Symo are there already…

2. Brian Walsh – as a kid I always hated this card even though he was an Essendon player, and he was one of those cards that you seemed to keep getting in every second pack you opened.  As a lid I thought he looked like a fat toad….nothing’s changed, he still looks like a fat toad.

Tipsmaster’s note: I too always hated this BAD FOOTY CARD – Just another famous ‘Walsh’ in the Essendon stable.

3. Wayne Primer – I think they got him out of bed and just told him “your hair looks fine, don’t worry about washing it just run a quick comb through it”.  I think Wayne had 365 bad hair days for a few years running.

Tipsmaster’s note: Primmer Donner? Click go the shears on that mop.

8.Phil Baker, Brent Crosswell, Frank Gumbleton & Malcolm Blight.  Nothing particularly funny bout these photos, but notice the signatures.  As a kid playing for Avondale Heights, we went and watched the Kangas train one cold winter night and I took my North Melb. footy cards in the hope of getting the signed.  I’ve included these cards to show Blighty for the tosser he was.  He refused to sign the card over his picture because “then you won’t see my face, son” and signed it on the reverse.  What a great ego. Did I ever tell the story about Kenny Fletcher and the dud cheque?……….

Tipsmaster’s note: Frank Gumbleton always looked about 45 and Snake Baker is a dead ringer for Marty Feldman! P.S. The Ken Fletcher dud cheque is a great story, Smitty…

. David Cloke, Gary Cowton, Peter Welsh & Goeff Raines -  a good sample of gay men hiding in the 1970’s.  I’ve actually got about 3 years running of Gary Cowton looking like this and I have a theory that he talked Peter Welsh into going to the hairdressers with him one day and getting the same perm.  Peter Welsh then tried to grow that beard to look a little more manly whilst Gary stuck with his mo as it worked a treat at the Blue Oyster Bar.

Tipsmaster’s note: They are brilliant BAD FOOTY CARDS, Smitty – P.S. Barnsey had a perm once – I’m still trying to get a hold of the photo…watch this space…

6. Ian Miller & Barry Padley – are these the scariest footballers you’ve ever seen, they both look like they’re just about to knock the shit out of the photographer. I think Barry was just asking the photographer “what the fuck are you looking at” as he was snapped.

Tipsmaster’s note: Avondale boys for sure, these 2

5. Kelvin Templeton – A true Bult lookalike, nothing more needs to be said.

Tipsmaster’s note: You know what they say, 1 in 3 of the world’s population is a Bult!

We all laughed at him, we all jeered, we all called him crazy but DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster and local madman, BARNSEY had the last laugh when his punt on Essendon provided a winner this round against Hawthorn.

Just to prove he is actually crazy, Barnsey has also had a dip on The Bombers winning the flag this year.

I noticed Shannon Grant has been suspended by the Kangaroos for mucking up at a sponsor’s golf day. 

It led me to question how badly would you have to behave to muck up at a Sponsor’s Golf day. 

What did he do? 

If ever he has played golf at the Barooga Golf Course he has probably had the old battle-axe lady from the pro shop chasing him to get the golf cart back such as happened to me at our cricket club golf day. She told me I was taking too long to play my round (the old bitch didn’t think to have a go at the weekend hackers who were in front of us for the entire 18 holes holding us up). 

Perhaps it could be like DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipsters STIV, MVP BARNSEY and COL who were fortunate enough to play a round at Moonah Links. After we had been wined and dined by the drinks cart for 17 holes, we decided to have a race in the golf carts up the 18th, over the bunkers and greens etc on the prestigeous course. (I scored 218 that day) 

Perhaps Shannon Grant took a wiz on the 11th tee aka DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, Mick Dollard from team ‘The Skases’ at Tocumwal. 

How about Rockstar Steve Williamson who did the helicopter hurl with his putter on the 16th at Yarrambat. His putter is still there today, flapping in the breeze at the top of the eucalypts 20 years later. 

Let me know your thoughts of what Shannon Grant could possibly have done to deserve club suspension.

Further to DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, STIVA’s request that we use a more recent photo of DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, MVP BARNSEY - refer STIVA’s comment on an earlier post:

How about a recent photo of the Barnseman. Since that was taken he has enlarged from a A-cup to a B, and the dimple on his chin has been replaced by his 15th chin.

Stiva has sent his latest snap of the amazing psychic.

Interesting to note the dimple on the chin has moved south to become the camel toe in the crotch…

He’s one of a kind our Barnsey from team MVP.
 
Many people have referred to him as ‘psycho’ in the past but on this occassion our Barnsey from team MVP has been proven to be in fact ‘psychic’!
 
MVP Barnsey submitted his tips in cryptic form again this round (as he does every round) and his words have proven to be quite prophetic in hindsight.
 
I quote from MVP Barnsey’s cryptic jargon, dated 18.4.08 where he entered his selection for the Bulldogs v Tigers clash:
 
“Poor Johno – Minson’s a cheat & they aren’t that good – upset, go Tiges”
 

Minson of course is the goal ace Bulldogs player who took the vital shot at goal to level the scores, when he was nowhere near the play.

 Psychic Barnsey has tipped Bulldog Will Minson to be a cheat 48 hours before the event.
 
Spooky stuff…
 
Such a prophesy puts our Barnsey in the same league as Nostradamus and Doris Stokes. 

Burn him at the stake I reckon.

He’s done it again, MVP Barnesy has entered his tips.

You know the drill, let me know if you have any ideas who he is tipping.

These are the round 2 cryptic tips as sent in by DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, MVP (or as he is better known, BARNSEY). If anyone has any idea who he has selected, please let me know…