Monthly Archives: February 2012

More on the Collingwood overload

Herald Sun Tuesday Feb 28 2012.

 
*Collingwood mentioned on the front page.

 
*Half page spread on the back page about a Collingwood player with possible mental issues.

 
*Quater page mention on back page about Travis Cloke.

 
*Second page from the back 3/4 page article on how Travis Cloke has not received an offer from Greater Western Sydney. (tipsmaster’s note: This is also the case for about 635 other league players and me. What is so special about the Collingwood bloke not receiving an offer? On this theory, you could write an article about Dale Thomas not being considered for the Prime Minister’s job)

 
*Also on this page, a follow up report of Sooky, Sooky Collingwood’s whinging about the Dees poaching their staff – sooky, sooky McGuire has threatened to pocket the spoils of the Queens Birthday clash if the Dees don’t back off!…what a sook…

 
*4th page from the back – a 1/4 page spread of Andrew Krakouer and his health fears.

 
*Same page about Collingwood’s young Kirk Ugle (the bloke with the household name) who wants to be given a game since Collingwood are riddled with injury.

 

I counted 9 Collingwood articles I could find (without even trying) in the sports section of the Herald sun on a day in the cricket season when Cricket’s Night of Nights awarded Michael Clarke the ALAN BORDER MEDAL. Cricket was allowed no mention on the front page, a mere photo on the back page and a full report 4 pages from the back.

 

All other AFL clubs combined amassed a total of 4 articles, one of Geelong (of which Collingwood got a mention), one of Greater Western Sydney’s Israel Folau (of which Collingwood got a mention), one about a comment from Hawthorn’s Alistair Clarkson, and one from Brad (I have the biggest face in footy) Ebert.

 

My advise to the sports editor of the Herald Sun. Stop writing about Collingwood because no one is interested and the ones who are can’t read anyway.

Photo’s courtesy of ihatecollingwood.blogspot.com and bigfooty.com

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Filed under Collingwood, dale thomas, Dees, editorials, Geelong, GWS, Hawthorn, Ridiclous commentsf from sooky, sooky Collingwood supporters

No more Collingwood!

A sure sign that footy is back is the repeated bulltish overload of the Collingwood football club in our newspapers.

On one day alone, (Herald Sun Friday Feb 24), I learnt that Melbourne are poaching some of Collingwood’s coaching staff and the poor old sooky, sooky Magpies are unhappy about it.

Woopity doot!

This piece of sports journalistic dribble should have been worthy of say a small column a few pages from the back page, but since it involved Collingwood, the ‘scoop’ was awarded the prime real estate position of a full spread on the back page where the real big sports stories should prevail. I might add, the story went under the misleading heading of ‘DEES RAID PIES’ which attracts the reader to the story to find out what darstadly deeds the Demons have been bestowing on the sooky, sooky Magpies. To read the story and find out that the raid was to poach such household names as Jason Taylor, Collingwood’s recruiting assistant…’ASSISTANT’! This followed on from the Dees poaching that famous sports physiotherapist, Gary Nicholls and assistant coach Leigh Brown.

I also learned that:

Dane Swan thinks he will return to Arizona mid year,

Travis Cloke is on top of the Free Agents wish list,

Phil Carmen is providing AFL players with legal, educational, investment, career and media advise,

Eddie McGuire is on a fitness kick,

Dayne Beams gave evidence in court,

and Dane Swann wants to get a tattoo in his ear…

I discovered all of this important information all before I reached the ’50/50 column!’

Today I open Sunday’s Herald Sun (which in my opinion is no more than a gossipy weekend magazine, tracing the movements of  Kylie, Lara and Kerry-Anne) to find another Collingwood overload on a weekend where they didn’t even play a semi serious match!

Did you know that Dane Swann and Dale Thomas went to Bali over the off season? I know because the Sunday Herald Sun wrote a scoop on it…

A full middle page spread of the over rated Nick Maxwell telling the world how only a premiership is good enough for his club. Isn’t that the situation with most clubs? He was also having a sooky about how Geelong were picking on him in the Grand Final.

Diddums.

I regret the fact that I am contributing to the Collingwoodfest with my post here but I had to get it off my chest. It’s gunna be another long year if this Collingwood hysteria is precedent of things to come.

Fortunately Julia Gillard attended a Bulldogs practice match this weekend so we may get to read something about Poor ol’ Footscray on Monday!

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Filed under Collingwood, dale thomas, Dees, editorials, footscray, Geelong, Poor ol' Footscray, Ridiclous commentsf from sooky, sooky Collingwood supporters

GWS Theme Song

Footy’s back and what a way to kick it off. The unveiling of the GWS GIANTS’ new theme song, written by Harry Angus.

Check the song out for yourself here:

http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/sport/afl/gws-giants-unveil-team-song/story-e6frexwr-1226273245245

This little dittie has a real Russian feel about it with more oomph and gusto than Freo’s ‘Song of the Vulgar Boatman’ (Hi Ho Heave Ho)

The GWS song led me to imagine the feel in the rooms of GWS if they ever win a game.

Will they celebrate by belting out the song, arms folded while doing the Cosak dance, followed by guzzling Vodka and a game of chess?

How about marching through the banner Goose Step style?

Will their mascot be Misha the 1980 Moscow Olympics bear?

Would their supporters look something like this?

It’s a great pity none of these questions will be answered in the short term because GWS have about as much chance of winning a game as the Tsars have of making a royal comeback.

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Filed under GWS, Humour