Category Archives: Rants

Come on Bomber supporters, where’s your passion?

Come on Bomber supporters, where’s your passion?

The deathly silence from Essendon supporters and the piss weak acceptance about our teams’ performances and where we are placed at the minute is making me sick.

After Adelaide yet again predictably pooped on Essendon at Moron Stadium, I expected the fallout on the radio waves to be alive with Essendon supporters livid about our performance… but not a murmur. The feeble acceptance from Essendon supporters about our club’s demise is indicative of the piss weak supporters of today who treat the game like an outing at the cinema.

Today’s game is so regimented and choreographed that passages of play resulting in goals are rewarded with polite applause from an audience who deep down know that the goal was most likely the result of a fluke rather than a set play from the coaches’ box.

Whatever happened to Essendon – the team with grunt, the envy of the competition, the hard nut, in your face, successful team that all others used to envy and dread?

I was shattered but not surprised that everyone except the most loyal and die hard Bombers in our footy tipping comp selected Adelaide to beat Essendon this round. Adelaide has been the whipping boy of most clubs this season, having only won 4 games before round 14, this tally of losses takes into account the massive home ground advantage Adelaide possess at Moron Stadium.

Essendon on the other hand this season have disposed of no less than St. Kilda, Hawthorn, Footscray and Carlton and pushed Geelong in round one, all of them teams in the eight. Sensibility tells you that Essendon should have been the obvious choice for a tipster’s selection this round against Adelaide but history tells us that Essendon buckles at the sight of an airport and couldn’t defeat Kalgoorlie 2nd’s if the game was played away.

Essendon’s 2002 to 2010 win/loss record is piss weak. Take the 2010 season for example. The Bombers have had some inspiring wins against some of the top teams, but I often think you are measured by the way you deal with the easy beats. This season Essendon have lost to last place West Coast, pissy, pissy Port Adelaide at home, Sydney, Freo at home (which perhaps is excusable since Freo are having a day out), Collingwood embarrassed the Dons on their precious ANZAC DAY stage and Richmond went goal for goal with them  after QTR time.

The Essendon mob have been bleating recently about how most weeks the Bombers have to play teams in the 8. Well this week was your chance, Essendon, you got Adelaide who are down the bottom of the list…and you ‘coughed’ it up (with a capital ‘F’)

From the gallant and brave Grand Final loss of 2001 to a handful of piddly finals appearances after, the mighty Essendon has fallen away to a pathetic pulse of poor performances, bad management, insipid coaching, recruiting of has-beens, gunnabees and project players.

If I hear one more person say how great it was that Essendon made the finals last year, I’ll throw my footy record at them. Ten and half wins is no reason to celebrate a finals berth and just desserts were dished up with a 15 goal loss in the Elimination Final. I keep hearing the same this year that Essendon can still make it…BOLLOCKS!

As an Essendon supporter, I am hurting about my team’s current placement. What pains me most is to see on tv our coaching staff of Knights and Camporeale having a laugh in the coaches box deep into the 3rd quarter while our team was 70 odd points down, meanwhile the die hard 40 year plus supporters are looking for answers about the crap, pissy, pissy footy we are dished up with week after week.

Knights and Camporeale indeed…

Today we heard from Brenton Stanton of the leadership group, apologising for Essendon’s loss on the weekend.

Oh wow…I feel better already…

Aftermatch apologies to the supporters carries no weight at all to me. – we’ve gone past that. Who the hell made Stanton a voice of my footy club anyway? Fair dinkum, Stanton is the worst number 5 Essendon has  ever had, and that includes Gary Parkes!

Maybe we don’t have the playing list of others, or the favorable draw, or the injury breaks. But these are piss weak excuses and it is not Essendon to buckle to the elements, nor is it Essendon to accept season after season of mediocre rubbish football.

Find your voice again, Essendon supporters. Protest and stand up to the drivel that we are exposed to each week. Hit the radio waves and for f*%& sake, show a bit of passion about our footy club or piss off and go to the cinema where soft cock supporters belong.



Filed under Adelaide, editorials, Essendon, Rants

Hitler’s rant on the All Australian Team


Check out the link for Adolf Hitler’s rant on the 2009 All Australian Team.

Lovingly sent to us by DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipsters Pear, Pommie and Smooks


Filed under AFL, editorials, Humour, Pommie, Rants, Smooks


A rant by Hooter

What the hell is Andrew demetriou doing with our game!!!! What sort of a numb-nutted dumbarse idea is it to have a floating fixture? As it is, these gelatinous parasitic pharisees at AFL headquarters, led by Demetriou and that other weasel Adrian “Which end of the football do you Kick” Anderson…what IS his claim to football fame other than having his head up Demetrious sphincter, can’t get a simple fixture right…play each other once, then start again until you hit 22 games each club has played…simple isn’t it…apparently not when you have Richmond and Hawthorn playing each other for the first time in Round 21 in a 16 team competition!!!!!

If this is “The Peoples” game, then maybe the positions on the AFL board should be elected by the people…those 2 morons would not stand a chance of getting their jobs back…GIVE ME BACK MY GAME!!!!!!


Filed under AFL, editorials, fixture, hooter, Humour, Rants

Groundhog day at the AFL



It’s becoming boring.

Everytime there is a draw in the AFL, the reporters, press and talk back radio stations go beserk with the ‘Why do we have to have the draw’ syndrome.

As soon as the siren went in the Richmond v North drawn game, I knew we would be going into meltdown with the whinging and grissling of the AFL press who are desperate for a story…any story…

It’s the same each year for the ANZAC Day clash as well – GROUND HOG DAY. “Let’s have a phone in to see if your club deserves to host the ANZAC DAY clash” they cry.

Then they start on getting rid of the umpires bouncing the ball.

It’s boring and monotonous.

These are all fantastic parts of our unique game.

Let’s face it. I love the AFL draw. It’s tense and exciting in the last moments of the game. One team is the winner and one is the loser anyway because one of the teams has quite often blown the game (as in Richmond this year) and someone has saved their skin (North Melbourne this year).

The draw is a fantastic part of our game. I take you back to the first ANZAC DAY clash. Both sides, Essendon and Collingwood were fantastic that day. The result was a draw and we are all still talking about it.

How about my favorite. The “One more Kerna” day at the MCG where Carlton Bult, Steve Kernahan kicked for goal from Kernahan’s pocket after the siren when scores were level . He kicked out of bounds on the full! Carlton lost the draw that day, Essendon won the draw.

I’ve heard people say that it was terrible to see players so deflated after the Richmond/North game. They reckon Brent Harvey looked devastated and depressed…well stiff bikkies, I reckon. Scenes like these are part of our great game. They didn’t know whether to sing the song or not…get over it and sing the song next time you win. (In Richmond’s case, they’ve probably forgotten the words anyway).

How about caretaker Richmond Coach, Jade Rawlings  who says he would rather have lost than finished on a draw. What kind of a fool statement is that?

Receiving 2 match points for the draw has often put a new slant on the shaping of the final 8.

*I’ve heard arguments for extended time of 5 minutes for each team.

*I’ve heard of a goal kicking shootout (you might as well toss a coin or do the paper, scissors, rock thing)

*How about the bloke who suggested that the team who kicks the first goal of the match should be retrospectively awarded the win in a drawn game.

*Or the next goal wins if scores are level at siren time – I hope we’re kicking with the wind with that one…

*One idiot even phoned the radio station to suggest a replayed match after the Grand Final – the funds to go to charity…Well I’m sorry, but when I begin my AFL career, I will be on the end of season trip for that one…

Mike Sheahan’s article in Tuesday 21 July Herald Sun just about made me sick. Sheahan always goes against the grain of our game as he is just another reporter desperate to fill his press column with a controversial headline.

That idiot Craig Hutchison was at it again on Talking Footy, Monday night. “Why is ours the only sport who doesn’t deal with a drawn contest?” he bleated. Well I’ve just got one word to say to Hutchy “Soccer”. Does this bloke forget that soccer deals up a draw in most of its encounters. Soccer World Cup has a penalty shootout which rewards the team with the best full forward.

How about cricket? You can play 5 days for a draw and I’ve seen some fantastic, tense and exciting drawn contests which go down to the last ball of the 5th day.

Our game goes for about 100 minutes, if you can’t separate the combatants in that time, well so be it. Enjoy the novelty of the draw. Some of the best games in history have been draws and these are games we are still often talking about.

Fair dinkum, I’m on my soap box about this one but I’m sick of people always trying to change what is perfect.

I’ve had enough – LEAVE OUR GAME ALONE.


Filed under AFL, ANZAC DAY, carlton, Collingwood, editorials, Essendon, HUTCHY, kangaroos, Rants, Richmond, umpires

Website hit count



DGES FOOTYTALK – our premier website.

Bizarre really.

I was a bit puzzled to log on to DGES FOOTYTALK today, only to find that we had 48 hits to the site today alone. What could it be?..thought I. After all, I haven’t entered a ‘Bad Footy Card’ for a few days or any other intelligent post of such note for that matter.

I delved a little further and found that we had no less than 78 hits from people who had googled “Voldemort” in their search engine thing in the past 2 days and they hence ended up at DGES FOOTYTALK. (You may recall that DGES FOOTYTALK carried the scoop that Carlton star, Chris Judd was playing the part of Voldemort in the Harry Potter movies).


Coincidence?…you may ask… but it just so happens that the latest Harry Potter movie, “Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince” hit the screens this week and the world has been googling for more info on the hit Harry Potter movies. As luck would have it for those googlees, they have all now experienced the joys of the DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP via DGES FOOTYTALK.

As they will all now know, The world is a far better place for experiencing the DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP. (far more entertaining than Harry Potter)

P.S Congratulations and thank you to our loyal fans. Our website hit count has registered 7136 views in just over 12 months. Considering we are only active for 6 months of the year, our very own DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP website is polling extremely well.

DGES FOOTYTALK: Our premier website.


TIPSMASTER’s NOTE: For the benefit of our Poor ol’ Footscray supporters, this is the AFL Premiership Cup…


Filed under bad footy cards, carlton, editorials, Humour, Judd, Rants, Uncategorized

AFL and the Cancer Awareness Cause



A rant by Hooter

Funny how the league allow those scum bucket Blue baggers to wear a yellow jumper for cancer awareness, yet for the past 3-4 years have deprived Essendon from wearing yellow armbands to support a player suffering from cancer…now the parasites at the league are “100% behind” the cause and have a Cancer Awareness match between Essendon & Melbourne and allow armbands, no money to be made from armbands is there…….Demetriou and Anderson are in the same league as Hutchison…parasitic turds out to line their own nests…what the hell was Adrian Anderson before he bummed his way into this job…fark off league administrators…you sh1t me!!!! 

1 Comment

Filed under AFL, Dees, editorials, Essendon, Rants

Hutchy’s at it again.


Well, well, well…he’s been at it again.

Most of you will know that I have little regard for the loud mouthed AFL reporter, Craig ‘Hutchy’ Hutchison.

Hutchy has a habit of shooting his mouth off with his overpowering ‘inyaface’ style of dramatic journalism and dynamic statements. Fair dinkum, Hutchy must be under pressure to find a story and as such, lo and behold, because of his premature ejaculation… – his credibility has plummeted to the pits yet again.

I refer of course to the debacle out at Punt Rd last week as AFL reporter, Craig Hutchison in reporting on the increasingly monotonous Richmond coaching job saga, fell for the all time sin of counting his chickens before they were hatched. Hutchy and his single minded yearn for a headline and being first to print has reinforced his cowboy, crash and bash style journalism and in doing so has probably sacrificed the real scoop and the story at hand.

“Terry Wallace – SACKED. Assistant coach Brian Royal – SACKED.  Jade Rawlings – NEW CARETAKER COACH” cried Hutchy.

All wrong.

How did Hutchy handle the aftermath of such a bumble?

He came out on channel 9’s AFL Footy Show to dig his own hole even deeper.

“The more humble the apology – the greater the man” (Col Gray).

Craig Hutchison had no intensions of apologizing to Wallace, Royal, Rawlings, or their families who have had to endure an arduous week. Instead, he got on his silver lined soap box and further reported on a heap of drivel involving the Richmond footy club. Hutchy’s obvious intension was to save his own skin and try to reinstate some self indulgent credibility – the kind that would have best been applied by a simple apology.

Hutchy chased Terry Wallace to his car,with a microphone rammed in his face, in classic ‘A Current Affair’ fashion. Wallace handled the situation with refined dignity.

So too, Hutchy harassed other Richmond players, Richo, Bowden, Captain Chris Newman and Mitch Morton as they left a club meeting for their cars. All players and coach handled the situation with dignity and virtually no comment which fell on deaf ears to Hutchy who claimed that they all confirmed what he had announced earlier in the week about the club in turmoil.

I saw no such confirmation from the Richmond footy club in Hutchy’s farcical display of headline journalism. What I did see was Hutchy clutching at straws for a story as he has done several times before.

Hutchy has never had an original thought in his life.

Many of you will recall that I first had issues with Craig Hutcheson and his reporting a couple of years ago. Hutchy on that occasion was on radio 3AW and reported a story about the Collingwood/Essendon ANZAC DAY clash He quoted facts and figures about how other teams had all had a chance at making ANZAC DAY a success before Collingwood and Essendon made the match their own. The facts and figures Hutchy quoted were virtually word for word for an article written earlier and printed in The Age newspaper, by DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, Bruce Clarke from team ‘PEAR’.

Never once in that radio article did Hutchy reveal the source of his information or own up to the fact that he had stolen his information from another source.

This sooky la la who won’t sit next to Sam Newman on The Footy Show because Sam picks on him, was at it again last night on Footy Classified. Hutchy openly quoted an article written by none other than his fellow panelist, Caroline Wilson! (why he would bother with that is anyone’s guess) but it is just another example of how this leech makes his living.

I’m glad that Hutchy got caught out last week with his Richmond coaching job blunder and the fact that he wasn’t big enough to own up to his mistake just further proves the weak limpet he really is.


Filed under editorials, Rants, Richmond