Category Archives: Tipsmaster

Disgraceful Tipstering Decision

Good morning tipsters.

I suppose by now most of you will have noticed on the tipping site www.footytips.com that we all tipped all 4 correct winners last weekend. Yes folks, as many of you notified me late last Friday, the tipping website had crashed so many of you were unable to submit your tips.

Hence the footytips website has decided to reward everyone with excellence, regardless of the fact that most of you pesky late tipsters were trying to get a sneaky edge over the rest of us by submitting your tips at the last minute.

Well let me tell you, I reckon it is a dead set disgrace. For the first time in my life I was head to head with tipster PEAR and one ahead of BARNSEY and PADDO. Now my one moment of tipstering glory has been bruitally taken away from me.

Bloody computers.

Oh woe is me…

Col – Your ever shattered tipsmaster.

This is the official message from the footytips website on the issue:

We will be awarding participating tippers correct tips and margins for all matches in all sports which occurred from
5PM AEDT Friday March 14th to Monday March 17th inclusive, as a result of the hardware and database issues that affected the footytips.com.au website and mobile platforms over the weekend.

We understand that many tippers were unable to make their selections over the weekend, and we believe this is the fairest solution for all active users.

Please note that we will not be awarding correct tips for the remainder of AFL round one from Thursday March 20 to Sunday March 23 inclusive.

We have taken steps to correct the technical problems that affected the footytips.com.au website and mobile platforms last weekend, and we are working hard to ensure you have a stable platform on which to make your tips.We apologise again for the inconvenience this has caused.

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Filed under administration, editorials, TIPS, Tipsmaster

Separated at birth – Tipsmaster…is that you?

Former DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipstress Loretta Plant from team KING CAREY has made a notable observation and submitted her latest episode of ‘SEPARATED AT BIRTH’ here at dgesfootytalk.

Loretta seems to think that celebrity singer SEAL somehow resembles your tipsmaster Col Gray.

Personally I don’t know what Loretta is on about…I can’t see the likeness at all…

What do you think?

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Filed under Separated at birth, Tipsmaster

Correction from your tipsmaster.

Dear DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipsters.
 
It has been brought to my attention that an error has occured in round 6 of the DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP. Even more alarming is that your tipsmaster is the culprit of the mistake…
 
Hard to believe, I know but maybe it is sheer evidence that I am only a little more superior than you cretins, rather than a lot more superior.

You see, I’m struggling to come to terms with the format of fixturing in this 2011 season. Some rounds have 8 games, others have only 7.
 
I am guilty of assuming that the winner of the jackpot for selecting 8 winners should be the tipster who picks 8 winners.
 
Alas – as you will all now be aware, round 6 contained only 7 matches and no less than 6 tipsters pick all 7 games correct. SOUPIE, PADDOSTIVA, POMMIE, LEGEND, and OUR MITZ
 
I can appreciate that you have all been behaving yourselves of late so I am going to reward those tipsters who select all matches correctly each round, regardless of if there are 5,6,7 or 8 matches for that round. Such is the kind heartedness of your tipsmaster
 
A round of applause for your tipsmaster please…
 
The six tipsters who selected the 7 winners correctly shall all share in the $15.00 that was on offer for round 6 meaning that you are all now the proud owners of $2.50 each. Let me know how you would like to claim your booty, or I can make a note of it on file and let the winnings accumulate until the end of the season. Alternatively, for those of you who are that way inclined, you can have a sip of my beer in lieu of payment if you so desire (please brush your teeth first).
 
This means that the jackpot for round 7 is now back to $5.00
 
I regret the error and inconvenience this has caused but not enough to say sorry.
 
Carry on…

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Filed under administration, col, competitions, Tipsmaster, Tipsters

BEARD – episode IV

Episode 4 of BEARD features a well prepared thinking man’s man.

DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, PEAR sent us this home crocheted do it yourself BEARD. PEAR has suggested that your tipsmaster may be able to put this home made snug and cosy beard to good use since I have fessed up about the fact that I grow an ordinary beard. (If the truth be known, my beard is not bad but my mo grows sparcely with the consistency of a well worn tooth brush…)

Keep your face warm, impress your friends with an instant beard, watch girls turn into boys in an instant with your new crocheted beard.

Congratulations to our latest contestant in BEARD for showing great initiative with his very sensible, removable, home crocheted beard. The twirly crocheted mo is also a distinguished accessory on the home crocheted beard.

(By the look of his home knitted beanie, I think he may be a Richmond supporter. N.P.R)

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Filed under BEARD, col, Humour, N.P.R, Pear, Richmond, Tipsmaster

SCENES WE’D LIKE TO SEE – EPISODE II

Matty Lloyd to full forward.

Matty Knights to Siberia.

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Filed under Essendon, Knights, lloyd, Scenes we'd like to see, Tipsmaster