Chewy on your boot Joe Daniher.

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Hit the road Jack

HIT THE ROAD JACK

Our Italian Correspondents BYRD, CONTESSA MANSKI and UNCLE EV are wondering who is going to Hit The Road Jack.,,

Ever notice how quitting is vilified as the worst thing you can possibly do, the mark of failure, shame or even worse a sign of weakness?

The reality is deciding whether to leave your sport is always going to be burdensome if not troublesome.

As we all have witnessed so far, the verifiable truth is that there will always be losses, monumental mistakes on and off the field, senior administrators, coaches and players’ no longer seeing eye to eye.

It happens quite a lot in this game.

The sooner you can acknowledge, accept any responsibility in removing that albatross wrapped around your neck, then the honourable thing to do is to put your hands up and just simply walk away from it all.

Learn something from all of the condemnation, concede that you and your playing team will be much better off and that this is just part of the ongoing process in the world of competitive sports.

Is it really that simple?

Not likely.

Some of the senior AFL coaches including well known star players, there are quite a few already as the AFL football world knows it, have passed their use by date, nevertheless are still stubbornly hanging on.

What for? Legendary status?

Play it safe, quit with dignity, otherwise you will be brought into all our critical minds as the disgraceful, incompetent shameful sporting professional.

We all know how the sporting media can be incredibly merciless and very unforgiving.

Mud sticks right?

Capaciously in this social media world of ours, the horrible truth is that concrete definitely sets and it is virtually unbreakable!

Certain individuals have unwillingly processed mentally that now is the time to vanish into mental blankness, nothing but a distant memory.

 

The burning question is who?…

 

Western Bulldogs

 

Luke “St. Luke” Beveridge was unyielding, devotional in his pilgrimage that his devout Bulldogs were last year’s premiership winners: “I’ve come a long way, I can’t quit now!”

Leon “King Of Leon” Cameron typically displaying his blatant disrespect and rudeness towards Luke barked: “Well Luke, my boys and I have no words to describe how we feel about all this. We do however have a ton of obscene gestures to show you.”

 

 

 

 

St Kilda

 

Alan “You Can Call Me Al” Richardson had no words of comfort for Alistair, walking inside the change rooms at the University Of Tasmania Stadium – Launceston, Richardson was emotionless: “The time you quit learning is the time you quit playing.”

Ignoring his insult, staring at a mirror inside the change rooms of the University Of Tasmania Stadium, distressed by this shocking discovery as opposed to his fallen Hawks, Alistair’s “Angry Little Man” Clarkson concluded: “Finally I figured out the reason why I look so bad in pictures. It’s my face!”

 

Carlton

 

Brendon “Thor!” Bolton was confident that this win could be highly likely, given that Bolts and his Blue boys have already been plunged into the bottomless pit of the AFL ladder cautioning: “Everything happens for a reason Jonno. But sometimes the reason is that you’re stupid and you continually keep making bad decisions.”

Overcome and beaten, John “Here’s Johnny!” Longmire could barely only articulate: “My luck is so bad at the moment, If I bought a cemetery, people will stop dying.”

 

Port Adelaide

 

“Have you ever listened to someone for a while and wondered…who ties your shoe laces for you?” Ken “Kinky” Hinkley fastened Chris’ game strategy.

Clutching his right hand into a tight fist, Chris “Reviewing The Situation” Fagan bitterly bit back: “When Karma comes back to punch you Kenneth, I wanna be there…just in case it needs help.”

 

Gold Coast Bums

 

Brad “Beam Me Down Scotty” Scott was defiant, his theory will not even hold water:

“We haven’t loss any games Rodney, we just ran out of time.”

“If you can accept your kangaroos losing every week, with that attitude you can’t possibly win any games.” Rodney “Rocket” Eade’s experience and well-informed knowledge shot Bradley back to the realism of a potential dismissal that keeps looming on his professional head.

 

West Coast Eagles

 

Adam, “Go West!” Simpson made it quite clear that Ross is now no longer the boss, ridiculing: “Hey Ross, no body wants to follow a losing team, time’s up old man!”

“The real problem is that you have really fantastic bad ideas with your Eagles.

“Better watch your back junior!” Cursed Ross “No Longer The Boss” Lyon.

 

Essendon

 

John “The Other Johnny!” Worsfold has strict standard guidelines before each game:

“This sporting code has two rules:

1 – Never Quit.

2 – Always remember rule number 1.”

“Once you learn to quit John, it becomes a habit, your ground rule is not really a true indicator of your Bomber’s game and ground plans. Simon “Simon Says” Goodwin validated.

 

Geelong

 

Exposing Nathan’s hardship with his deflated Magpies, taunting him even further, Brad “Beam Me Up Scotty” Scott relished: “It’s not whether you get knocked down, It’s whether you and your Pies will ever get up!”

Agitated by another prospect of another feasible loss, Nathan “Definitely I’m Gonna Be Sacked!” Buckley debated: “Winning means unafraid to lose, you and your conceited kitty Cats should try it some time Bradley!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Adelaide

 

Don “Is Don…Is Good!” Pyke gave a stark reminder as to who has flown and landed on top of the AFL ladder: “Actually we are all too fit too quit!”

Damian “Hardly” Hardwick was contemptuous: “You’re love makes me strong, your hate makes me unstoppable Donald.”

 

After the sixth round, somebody’s bags are packed, and the final pay cheque has been issued.

 

Time hit the road Jack…..

And don’t you come back no more, no more, no more, no more!

 

 

https://youtu.be/Q8Tiz6INF7I

 

 

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Blame it on the Boogie

Our Italian Correspondents BYRD, CONTESSA MANSKI & UNCLE EV are wondering who to blame for the errors, losses and misfortunes in our great game. Should we blame it on the Boogie?

Boogie

It really commences with the initial match every Friday evening, the opening game for the round.

Friday night football at the MCG.

Cosing up in front of the telly in your jim jams, with a bottle of Carlton Draught, not forgetting some good ol’ take away – Fish n’ Chips from your local Chippery.

The first goal for the evening is accurately kicked, the blame game suddenly begins.

Out of frustration you spill your beer and your bottle smashes on to the floor into millions of pieces.

What is the first thing that comes out of our mouths without hesitation?…

The worst possible abuse, blasphemy and insult humanly imaginable.

Just as well it is in the comfort of your own living room, no need to worry about being apprehended by the officials, the prospect of being seized by members of your own family is highly likely.

Into the know of the competitive world of AFL footy, the resolution is not a quick fix by mopping up some beer and eating your prized soggy Fish n’ Chips, the repercussions are a lot more serious.

Reputations will be destroyed, instant dismissals, humiliation including the downward spiral of that crevasse of the AFL ladder with the pale rider happily waving that bloody wooden spoon.

 

Blame it on the coach? Blame it on their players’ kicking skills? Blame it on the rain? Blame it on Zeus the Apollo and Adonis?

 

Or is it the senior coaches’ including their players’ that just can’t seem to control their feet?

 

Carlton

 

Brendon “Thor!” Bolton was in no mood for any inspirational pep talks with his Blue boys prior to this game, just some cold hard facts: “Sometimes, not saying anything is the best answer”.

“Correct me when I’m wrong Bolts, but don’t correct me when you are!” Ken “Kinky” Hinkley intervened, irritating Bolton even further.

 

Western Bulldogs

 

“Boys, if you don’t do your part, don’t blame God!” Luke “St. Luke” Beveridge evangelized to his beloved Bulldogs.

Tuning in on “St. Luke’s” sermon, Chris “Reviewing The Situation” Fagan snorted in disgust: “You’re opinion is not my reality”.

 

Adelaide

 

“Listen Rodney, you can’t change someone who doesn’t see an issue in their own actions.” Don “Is Don…Is Good!” Pyke lectured, convinced that this match was going to be an easy victory.

“I’m only responsible for what I say not what you understand!” barked Rodney “Rocket” Eade.

 

GWS (Geez!…Which State?)

 

“Stop looking for someone to blame and bloody well fix it!” Leon “King Of Leon” Cameron disgraced Johnno, relishing the fact that his defeated Swans are still languishing beneath the crypt of the AFL ladder

“Maybe so Leo, you seem to be only clever at shifting the blame from your own shoulders to those of others.” John “Here’s Johnny!” Longmire shielded, clutching at every feasible hope longing for that miraculous win.

 

Fremantle

 

“Stop pointing fingers and placing blame on others, only your game and preparation plans can change to the degree that you accept full responsibility for it.” Ross “No Longer The Boss” Lyon disciplined.

“You’re right, but we cannot sit and stare at our wounds forever.” Brad “Beam Me Down Scotty” Scott sulked, pouting his lower lip, shedding a tear.

 

Geelong

 

“Do it now or forever wish you had”. Insisted Chris “Beam Me Up Scotty” Scott to his unstoppable Cats.

Obviously peeved by their triumphant formula, Alan “You Can Call Me Al” Richardson rudely scolded: “Oh I’m sorry Christopher, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?”

 

West Coast Eagles

 

Adam “Go West!” Simpson was remorseless with this reality: “Don’t play the victim to circumstances you have created”.

“It’s always my fault isn’t it?” Alistair “Angry Little Man” Clarkson wailed, tugging at his hair.

 

Richmond

 

“It’s always the ones with the filthy hands pointing the fingers”. Damien “Hardly” Hardwick was incredibly smug, for how much longer, only time will certainly tell.

Certifying that Damo needed therapy in behaviourism issues, Simon “Simon Says” Goodwin was transparent with his thank-you note: “Cancel my subscriptions because I am done with your issues”.

 

Essendon

 

John “The Other Johnny” Worsfold knew Bucks was wired for an all out total war, attacking his Bombers’, Worsfold went in for the kill: “I didn’t say it was your fault I said I was going to blame you for everything!”

“My attitude is as a result of your actions! If you don’t like my attitude, blame yourselves! Nathan “Sure As Hell I’m Gonna Be Sacked!” Buckley stormed off in his customarily charismatic nature.

 

 

Actually we know who is really to blame for this entire flurry and ruffle…

 

Blame it on the Boogie.

 

 

https://youtu.be/mkBS4zUjJZo

 

 

 

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What do Hawthorn and my mobile number have in common?

0-4

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Poofy Cats v Wee & Poo

GEE HAW

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by | April 21, 2017 · 12:18 pm

Hawthorn Wee & Poo achieve the 4Peat

HAW 4

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Owen Fourthorn

HAWTHORN

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by | April 21, 2017 · 12:13 pm