JACKPOT WON AGAIN!

It seems that so far this year, DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipsters are excelling at their tipping. Week 2 and the jackpot has again been won, this time seven tipsters selected all 8 winners correctly to share in the $5.00 spoils. FOOTSCRAZY, DAMIEN, JHUD, THE DOGGFATHER, THE DON, WHIPSPER, and MICHELLE will all share $0.70cents each.

Such great prizes you can win in the DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP…

These are the round 2 cryptic tips as sent in by DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, MVP (or as he is better known, BARNSEY). If anyone has any idea who he has selected, please let me know…

TIPSMASTER’S TIPS FOR ROUND 2

BRISBANE

WESTERN BULLDOGS

ADELAIDE

ST. KILDA

FREO

SYDNEY

GEELONG

KANGAROOS – (RICHMOND WILL WIN THIS BUT AS YOU ALL KNOW, I NEVER, EVER, EVER PICK RICHMOND)

THE MEANING OF LIBBER

DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP tipster, MANSKI is our Italian correspondent and has enlightened us with this little gem of information about Tony Liberatore.

Just a quick fact for you, did you know that the english translation of the word “libratore”, as in Tony Libratore, (Assistant coach), my cullo, translation: my ass, means to release, let go. Hhhmm, that kinda got me thinking, you see I have this conspiracy theory, (yeah, yeah I know it’s just the start season…) or maybe with this indian summer my grey matter might have just been exposed to the uv’s for a little longer than usual.

But, maybe dear old “libba” had something to do with the suspected “tanking”, or maybe he’s just one big sookie la la!. While he was, ahem, excuse me while I just stop laughing out loud hysterically, and at the same time nearly weeing my pants, assistant coach for the blues, (hhmmph), all he ever did at the blues camp, was to yell from across the ground: “kick it me, kick it to me”, or he suffers from short man syndrome. Libratore, yeah, I would have “let go”, “released” “got rid” of him many moons ago! Just thought I’d toss a few ideas in the wok yeah?… Ladies and gentlemen, let the games begin!   

Tunnelling

Am I the only one who thought St Kilda’s claim that Craig Bolton had ‘tunnelled’ Nick Reiwoldt sounded a bit gay?

(Not that there’s anything wrong with that…)

Signed Pear

‘OUR MITZ’ JACKPOT WINNER!

Jackpot winner ‘OUR MITZ’ is jubilant as she finds herself $5.00 richer for selecting all 8 correct winners in round 1.

Knobhead Journos

A rant from Hooter

Fellow tipster Pear regularly blasts Craig Hutchison for his soft journalistic reporting and also for plagiarising ideas, well Hutchisons former colleague on Channel 10, Andy “How nerdy am I but I hang out with sporty types and comedians” Maher, is just as much a moron. On the Before the Game show on Saturday night his knuckleheaded comments on the Collingwood-Freo game were, “What an important game for both teams”…IMPORTANT…it’s Round 1 for God’s sake, yes it’s nice to win, but it’s not as if it’s Round 18 and important to get an extra games lead on them heading into the finals…what an idiot…journalism must be one easy university course if idiots like Hutchison and Maher can get through…is there a journalist out there actually worth listening to, or reading. With these two being high profile representatives of their profession, the credibility stakes of journos would only marginally be better than used car salesmen and insurance reps!!

Traitor to the NPR cause

A DGES Footytalk rant by Pear

Hang your head in shame, Tipmaster.

Many years ago, you invented the Never Pick Richmond movement. In that time, NPR has attained cult-like status amongst its followers. We have revelled in Tiger misery, and benefited on the WFDGESFTC leaderboard.

We laughed when Richo thought he’d kicked the winning goal v the Bombers last year, and then spat the dummy when he found out it was a free kick against him.

We cheered on the cocky Terry Wallace every time he fronted the media and explained his rolling 5 year plan for AFL dominance.

We smirked at their lack of skill.

We jeered as soft cocks like Fiora and Hilton hung out of packs.

We enthusiastically watched Richmond supporters turn on each other and eat their own.

We praised the NPR Lord when the ferals spat at Danny Frawley.

We pissed ourselves when they finally won a game and no-one had their theme song on hand.

What days. What memories.

And now we find out that you, our leader, has deserted the movement. Shame, Colin Gray, shame.

It’s as if Germaine Greer has given up feminism.

As if Margaret Thatcher has decided to vote Labor and picket the mines.

As if Elton John has gone straight.

As if Robbie Williams has given up women.

Please please please please Colin Gray – come back from the dark side before it’s too late.

(PS – You haven’t been abducted by A Current Affair have you?)

Tipsmaster’s tips for round 1

My tips for the introductory round.

Get a load of this you lot. I’m gunna break the golden rule of the DGES WORLD FAMOUS FOOTY TIPPING COMP, – a bit like dropping and shattering the 11th commandment.

I’m tipping RICHMOND to beat Carlton. Mainly because I hate Carlton who think they are king dick again. Don’t laugh, I’m serious  –  The Tigers are dead set certaintys.

PORT ADELAIDE at home – not enough Abletts at Geelong.

Collingwood

St. Kilda

West Coast

Adelaide

Hawthorn

Essendon

Looking at those tips I think I’m gunna be doing catch up tipping all year…

GOAL!

I’d like to share a story with you about two of my uncles, Len and Jack Gray.

In their day, both Len and Jack were VFL umpires.

After returning from World War 2, Uncle Len became a VFL umpire along with his younger brother, my Uncle Jack. Both men umpired with distinction for many years. Len later became a goal umpire when he felt he had become too old to run the field all match, while Uncle Jack continued field umpiring and later became an umpire’s adviser.

After his umpiring retirement, Jack’s job was to go to VFL games to watch and report on the match performances of the VFL umpires. Many times I remember my dad saying that Jack saw to it that a certain umpire would be umpiring in the country this weekend, thanks to Uncle Jack’s umpire’s report. Family legend has it that Jack was responsible for sending umpire Harvey Lyons to the country after Lyons’ several ordinary performances in the late 1970’s. I vividly remember developing a passionate dislike for Umpire Harvey Lyons because of what I saw as his obvious bias against my beloved Bombers.

Sadly, Uncle Len passed away last week at the grand old age of 87. Jack told a few funny stories at Len’s funeral about their umpiring days. One in particular made everyone laugh.

In the old days, the goal umpire would always leave his position in the goal square to run down the field and break up fights on the football ground. This particular day was semi final day at the MCG in the 1950’s. Len was goal umpiring this day, while Jack was watching from the grandstand. A brawl broke out amongst the players in the centre of the ground so Len left the goal square at the city end of the ground to run all the way to the centre of the MCG to help break up a fracas.

The field umpire in his wisdom decided that the best way to stop the fight was to bounce the ball and get the game under way again.

Of course, the ruckman for the team kicking towards the city end goal got the tap out to the rover who booted the ball towards the goal with the missing goal umpire.

Goal umpire Len panicking that he would miss the moment, sprinted back down the ground towards the goals as fast as he could. His long white coat almost tripping him up on a couple of occasions, holding onto his hat on his head the whole way, while the footy was being booted closer to the goal. Racing against the speed of play, Len made it back to his position at the goals just in time to see the ball sail over his head between the big sticks. Doubled over and well and truly out of breath, Len gallantly signalled the two fingers to indicate the goal.

If you have any great footy stories why not share them with us via DGES Footytalk.